In fact, the 1st step in ensuring that your baby will bond with others is to attend to his needs in a timely fashion & let him know that he's loved. A baby is dependent on caregivers for everything from nourishment to safety, so her initial bond is very strong, explains D'Arcy Lyness, PhD, a child psychologist & psychology editor for KidsHealth.org.

It also sets the standard for what a baby expects in later relationships in terms of emotional security, trust & predictability. All of your loving care comes back when your baby reaches or babbles to you.

We've all heard that imitation is a form of flattery. This is true for babies too. In fact, imitation is a way in which babies show their preference for certain people over others. You'll see that between 3 & 6 months of age, your baby will try to mimic your actions.

Showing Their Love

Before 8 months of age, a baby's signs of affection are rather subtle. That is, until stranger anxiety & separation anxiety kick in. Hand your baby to a relative or babysitter - even someone he's met before - & he'll cry for you.

As flattering as this may seem at first, it'll get old if hysteria sets in every time you leave the room. Fortunately, separation anxiety will lessen over time & the same tactics you've always employed to make sure your baby feels safe & secure - meeting his needs & showing him love - will give him the security to explore relationships with others.

It's also around this time that babies start to demonstrate affection for their peers, provided they've spent lots of time with other babies. The signs may be subtle: Your 9-month-old lights up when a friend comes over & is sad when he leaves. You may also notice that as soon as your baby can crawl, he'll go to one special friend, adds Cohen.

Around the 1-year mark, babies learn affectionate behaviors such as kissing. It starts as an imitative behavior, says Lyness, but as a baby repeats these behaviors & sees that they bring happy responses from the people he's attached to, he becomes aware that he's pleasing the people he loves. As a result, your baby will start to use these behaviors more frequently.

Making Friends

For lots of kids, toddlerhood is a prime time for friendship. Toddlers have the memory to recall enjoyable experiences with others, can clearly demonstrate their affection for other kids verbally & are beginning to understand empathy.

Encourage your child to form friendships as a toddler: Studies show that the earlier kids learn to form positive relationships, the better they're at relating to others as teenagers & adults. Playing w/peers also helps kids practice social behaviors, such as kindness, sharing & cooperation, says Lyness.

Even so, how quickly your child develops into a social creature may also depend on his temperament. Some toddlers are very social, but others are shy. In addition, the way that toddlers demonstrate that they like other children is markedly different from what adults think of as expressions of friendship.

Research at Ohio State University in Columbus found that a toddler's way of saying "I like you" during play is likely to come in the form of mimicking a friend's behavior.

This seemingly unusual way of demonstrating affection can result in unpleasant behavior. After all, toddlers are still toddlers. Regardless of how much they like a playmate, they may still grab his toys, throw tantrums, refuse to share & get bossy. But experts say that this is a normal & necessary part of friendship for kids this age.

Thru play experiences, toddlers learn social rules, says Lyness. That's why it's so important to take an active roll in your toddler's social encounters by setting limits & offering frequent reminders of what they are. When you establish these guidelines, explain the reasons behind them. ("Hitting hurts. If you want a toy, ask for it nicely.")

Begin by helping your child learn compassion ("Ben is crying. What's making him so sad? Maybe he wants the ball & you have it now"), then suggest how he could resolve the problem ("Maybe he'd feel better if you give him a turn"). When your child shares or shows empathy toward a friend, praise him. ("Ben stopped crying! You made him feel better.")

Another way to encourage healthy social interaction is by encouraging kids to use words -- not fists -- to express how they feel. It's also important to be mindful of how your child's personality affects playtime. Kids are cranky when they're sleepy or hungry, points out Lyness, so schedule playtime when they're refreshed.

Regardless of how your child makes chums, one thing is certain: Friendships enrich our lives.

The information on this Web site is designed for educational purposes only. It isn't intended to be a substitute for informed medical advice or care. You shouldn't use this information to diagnose or treat any health problems or illnesses w/out consulting your pediatrician or family doctor. Please consult a doctor w/any questions or concerns you might have regarding your or your child's condition.

Affection is something that flows among people, something that one gives & receives. 

To provide affection is something that requires effort.

Affection is something essential for human species, especially in childhood & when ill.

Alienation of Affection

By James W. Prescott, Ph.D. 

From Psychology Today, December 1979.

When you see a friend at school, do you offer a hug or embrace?

If a friend comes up to you & offers you a hug or embrace, how does it make you feel?

Being affectionate is showing your feelings of love, caring or concern for another person w/a physical touch, a caring word, or letting a friend lean on your for warmth & understanding.

This makes them feel sad, unloved & without value....

 & feeling like that can make you tired, angry & sometimes "act out" against those feelings... especially if you don't know what to do about changing these feelings in your life....

This is why teens often reach out for love thru sexual activity... confusing sex with the love or affection they're lacking...